You feel inadequate, you are insecure, you say you don't believe you deserve a relationship... you describe yourself as a bore and that other people should not have to put up with you...

Do you think these are attractive traits to potential partners? Are these qualities people would fall for?

If this is how you describe yourself, are you really surprised your crushes inevitably go for someone else?! Work on yourself first. How can you expect others to like you and want to be with you when you don't even seem to like yourself.

This is the energy you are putting out to others and it is not going to attract people, it will push them away.