Hello,

A few weeks ago I ended a relationship of about 6 months. We parted amicably and are on good terms. She is sad and I think she is struggling a little bit, but she seems to be Ok. We saw each other last night at an event with several other people.


I've struggled a little bit trying to figure out why I ended it. Over the years, I have gotten pretty good at discerning what my feeling are.


What is much harder for me is believing my feelings, or more specifically, trusting that it is Ok to feel whatever it is I am feeling. This mentality dates back a very long time to when I was young and some of the messages my parents gave me at that time.


But the gist of it is I have a very hard time believing my feelings are real ... and trusting them.

In this case, specifically, I didn't feel a sense of commitment with my partner. It's very sad, and I don't mean this is in a bad way ... but most of the time we were together ... I wish that we weren't. I secretly wished I was doing activities on my own, or having my freedom so I could date other people.

At the end of the day I just didn't feel it was fair to her to continue like this. I felt like I was living a lie, and I also didn't feel like I was honoring my own truth.

I still feel like I probably made the right decision. But it was hard seeing her last night.