Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv
It’s not a matter of how people might perceive you or judge you if he badmouths you, this is a matter of doing it right. There are laws of how divorces divide assets/debts as well as some negotiation between the parties. You are doing the right thing asking a lawyer who would represent you what you should be entitled to. You shouldn’t have to do all kinds of irregular dysfunction shenanigans in a divorce as this has been going with shady lawyer friends who are favoring him, and him bribing you with money for affection, just giving you this money. It doesn’t work this way, it’s done in the terms of a divorce and handled on paper, very up and up. What is with all this back room dealing? This just isn’t how it works.
But, we all understand you are divorcing a toxic, abusive piece of work, so it is to be expected from him. You are doing the right thing now.
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Very good post.
Often times one of the divorcing spouses tries to convince the other not to have court order, not to hire lawyers, not have custody order or child support or alimony on paper but instead do it under the table. I had girlfriends whose ex husbands tried to convince them not to hire a lawyer in divorce. It was always done with the goal of screwing her over
It’s almost always done because one party is doing something fishy and is trying to get out of paying what they actually owe
Hiring a lawyer doesn’t mean you are after money. It means you do what everyone does as a divorce process. What’s he going to tell people (and what people?): my wife hired a lawyer. And???