Im having a heart attck that Teixeira is the name of the national guard secret spiller. I was like, wait - i know that name! Okay, i guess ten years back, but still!

I havent watched or listened to a game yet this year. is dustin pedroia still around? Or jacoby whatsisname? They were my two favorite rookies. Or the redsox pitcher that ripped off his fingernail and benched himself?! I called into the stadium and offered to be the team manicurist.