Your wife is all about the “me,I,I”. She is all about the AUD and her victim mentality. Your wife doesn’t see how her actions and behaviors hurt others. She doesn’t worry about your welfare, she just wants the money and feels she is entitled.

You genuinely care and you have repeatedly accepted accountability. She still chooses to use it to hurt and control you. She uses how you feel about her against you. Caring compassionate people don’t do that.