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chaotic13 said:

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pinksoil said:
She is responsible for keeping her own emotions in check in order to focus on you.

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Pink I read this line and my initial response is...This is my biggest problem right now. I do this so well that it has become automatic and I can't not do it. I understand that T's are expected to regulate their personal emotions (especially ones that relate to the patient or patient's situation). My T has told me emotions are not good or bad, that I shouldn't suppress them or ignore them, I should feel comfortable crying or expressing ("Emoting") in front of people...emotions are normal human responses...blah...blah. .blah.. I understand that you can't let it all bleed out while at work, but isn't this a bit hypocritical?

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I don't think so, because there nature of the therapeutic situation is that the client is the one to be focused on. The therapist should, of course, show a human side to his/herself, but there has to a line drawn so that it does not add to the upset for the client. Many of us already struggle with a great deal of guilt and helplessness. As a therapist, you have to be aware of what you are bringing into that room, and how it is going to affect your client. The client is the #1 priority in that room for those 50 minutes, or however long you see your therapist.

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Maybe her T, when she realized that she was having trouble should have explained the situation, that it had nothing to do with Dalila, and then asked her if she could reschedule for another time.

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I agree that this could have been a better approach if her T absolutely could not help what happened.

I have seen my T emote before-- but it has always been with me as the focus. He has admitted countertansference ot me and, at times, has told me that I have shared with him has made him feel like crying, has gotten him angry,etc. These are the type of emotinal disclosures that are appropriate in therapy.

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Dalila, maybe you gave your T more than you think. You were a patient that cared enough to allow your T to still try and help you, even when she wasn't at her best.

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I couldn't agree more. Most patients would not have reacted in the caring and calm way that you did. Again, that was not your responsibility to do so, but you did. I know my reaction would have been very different.