Dear T,
So the problem with my feeling more secure in the relationship is that then I start thinking of other reasons unrelated to me personally that it would need to end. Even worse if I start thinking of those when I'm awake in the middle of the night.

I considered emailing you about one of them, but I imagine it would seem totally random if I didn't mention seeing the site about your research project where you mentioned wanting to start a book. And if I told you about that in the email, then you might get weird about it, even though it's a professional endeavor (and you sort of mentioned it once in session a few months ago).

Maybe on Sunday, if I don't have enough to discuss from the party or if it's still weighing on me, I'll bring up a sort of general question. Like, "Are you considering leaving your practice here for any reason?" I don't know. I still think of when you told me last year that you'd applied for another job a couple years before, but it didn't pay nearly enough. Which kind of freaked me out, as it was during the time I was seeing you. At the time, you said you didn't intend to apply for other jobs--how that just seemed like a particularly amazing opportunity (till you learned about the pay). So I guess I could just use that as a launching point.

And of course I want to know you're not, say, dying. Like I was a bit concerned you were drinking tea instead of coffee today. But I'm glad you explained that when I asked (though that was more that I was concerned you had a sore throat or something, in which case I might have opted for the further seat).

Love,
LT