And also don't know how I'm so calm, based on how good I feel. It's a strange problem that I want to fix.

I'm just normal, and I see the world.. "How can people be so unstable?".. At least I should be able to DO THINGS, and make some sort of plan to get somewhere, about it all..

And the flames of things burning, I see it.. and think "Well what's the point?". It's also another huge problem for me.

It's like I've settled into eventually dying, and going to some insane afterlife. I don't wake up from this dream.. Like what is next, is just.. More advanced insanity... The logical thing would be to just disconnect from everything, like how people say they'll "Live in the woods" - I thought (About that), "Why would someone live the rest of their life so under stimulated" - And the answer? Spirituality.. That most people that are awake/aware of the nonsense, they're just doing w/e here, and wait for the clock to run out, and then will decide what to do on the other side..