Hi everyone. I'm still around, just been hanging around other parts of the forum. I've been doing very well lately. Absolutely no psychotic symptoms. Usually I hear some whispering or mumbling or see some spiders or something nothing major every now and then, but on my Haldol/Vraylar combo there is literally nothing. Not even an ounce of paranoia except when it's warranted.

I'm looking for places to volunteer. I'm especially interested in this farm in the next town over. Also looking at the animal shelter, fish and game, and the local park. I realized I was in an abusive relationship and went NC with. Literally everybody in my life was ecstatic when they found out he was out of my life, except my mom who didn't know shyt about what he was doing to me.

I hit a real low with my bulimia about two weeks ago. Around 2am I had a binge/purge session and I went outside in the woods behind my house to purge so I wouldn't wake my mom up in case I made a lot of noise. Now this was the fourth time I b/p'd in the past 20 hours. After I just kinda laid there, and I was shaking, and I couldn't get up for like an hour. It was scary. I only b/p'd 4 times since.

I'm worried my spring/summer mania is coming back. Last few days I've been waking up at 3am frustrated the sun isn't out because I want to go for a run. We need a 24 hour gym around here lol. Running on a treadmill isn't comparable to running through the woods, listening to all the birds, smelling all the pine sap, maybe seeing some bear scat and hoping you're not running FROM the bear, feeling that crisp, clean air in your lungs though. should take my PRNs more often though to avoid another episode. I will. I really will.

Anyways, sending hugs to all of you, and extra love to those who are struggling