People who abuse alcohol ARE gaslighters.

Hanging out in bars/clubs and engaging in drinking and looking for “supply”is not healthy. Often it leads to experiencing many failed relationships and gaslighting themselves into believing they are the victim. Their life revolves around their addiction to alcohol. Yet, they think it’s ok to accuse others for having the problem. They often continue to return to the snake pit club life finding creative ways to make it sound like that is not what they are doing. Again, gaslighting.

From what you share, this is the direction your wife and her new drinking buddies are heading just gaslighting themselves into thinking it’s life changing in a positive way.