So sorry Pinny,you too are experiencing grief and loss.For long I thought all of us children were treated bad.I tried to share my feelings with my sibling, not realizing she was the golden child. She got angry at me and told me mom was a good mother.I was so confused by her reaction.I then really thought I must be really a bad child and unlovable. If she was a good mother,but treated me bad,then I must really deserve it.I felt worthless.Not until recently, when I read about narcissism, that I realized I was the scapegoat and my sibling is the golden child.She was treated well that's why she got defensive when I talked about my parents.She was treated differently. Since then I didn't dare speak out to anyone else in real life.More over my parents are very nice outside the home,even to strangers. That makes it hard to tell on them to outsiders because they only see the good side.My parents have carefully crafted their fake nice images for the world to see.