Just back from the gym. It was a tough workout.

I'm struggling with SH thoughts again. I really don't understand where they're coming from. I notice them when I start to make plans. I try to stop them but they are very strong.

I workout at home until I can feel pain to try to offset the thoughts because maybe I'm thinking I want to feel something but it's not the same.

My pdoc is aware of this and has referred me to an IOP program. I'm just waiting for them to get back to me.