I feel this sense of clarity. Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself.

Watching videos of strong feminine types lifting heavy weights and looking so muscular makes me want to just focus a lot on the gym.

I want to be strong again. So strong. I need to get back to where I was. Damn COVID made me stay away from the gym and ruin most of my progress.

I’ll do it. I need to settle down. Stop the drinking and just focus on being strong.

Lifting weights and eating good.

None of this drinking and anorexia stuff.

I need to get back to going to the gym like five days a week. I have to start off slow. I’m so impatient though. Sigh.

I’ll do it.

I’m not going to buy more alcohol. I’ll finish off the gin and the beer and the vodka ice teas. That’s it. If I’m at a restaurant sure I’ll have a drink but I won’t buy anything from the liquor store. That’s it. I’m done.

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