I feel your frustration because my husband has ED and also says he is not attracted to me at my current weight (I am losing weight so we will see). We did have a good sex life for 25 years. He thinks it is normal not to want sex anymore (he's 64).
BUT he still hugs me, holds hands with me and kisses me (not passionate kissing). If he didn't do those things.
Are you satisfied if your wife would just hug you and hold hands? Or would you always be wanting more?