I sympathize with your situation, and have similar.

Mother (88) wanted me to take care of her. It is a long, complicated story. But essentially what happened is neither of my sisters or I am taking care of her in the way she wanted, and felt unreasonably entitled to.

Everybody had to stand firm in their boundaries with her about this. You will need to do this, too. It was very horrible and uncomfortable for the whole family to get put on the spot about who is going to take Mom. Everybody said No. Mom was furious. I was able to talk to lawyers who helped us make a plan. Then she had to resign herself to this is the way it is. It’s not like we did a bad thing to her. She has a nice apartment, Medicaid, and will go to facilities that are perfectly fine when she can’t care for herself. This has been a back and forth situation between facilities and her home recently, and she will eventually need to be in the facility when she needs to for the long term.