I’ll just respond to a few of your questions and observations.

You said: “Example: I’m almost never certain if I should contact a new aquaintence again after meeting them or not.”

My response: I am not one to try to quickly make contact with a new acquaintance. Instead, I give it time. After we’ve gotten to know each other through whatever forum we interact, down the road if we’re truly meshing, then I find we mutually and very naturally make plans at that point. It can take time and many exposures to a person before you can truly get a good sense for who they are and whether you really want more contact with them. Perhaps one problem you are experiencing is that many people want time to even decide if they are interested in knowing your further, while you seem to jump right into wanting more contact. Most people don’t move that quickly.

You said: I have to rely on my intuition more than the b.s they say now. What’s the most confusing is when thet try to make plans with you or ask you to contact them then blow you off. Weird!

My response: You call it b.s (which honestly sounds pretty judgmental since your premise is that you don’t know what they are thinking — just an observation). Perhaps your intuition they they are lying is off. It may be that there is a reason they haven’t gotten back to you. If a person does initiate a plan to get together with you but it falls through, what most people would do is just give them a quick contact and ask if it’s still in the works AND if they say no, we say something like, “Okay, sorry our plans fell through. If you want to try later, you have my number,” and we let it go. I mean, sometimes with people I truly enjoy, we’ll talk about wanting/needing to get together sometime, but the reality of our busy lives often means those ideas don’t come to fruition. We don’t resent each other for that. We completely realize we liked the idea of a get-together, but life is often too busy.

As far as conversations go, I find that sometimes the other person just needs time to be heard, and I am perfectly okay being a good listener. Generally, down the road a moment will arise when that person will reciprocate the favor and the discussion will focus on me. But most of the time, I don’t engage in deep and intense discussions with acquaintances. I reserve those heavy talks for those very closest to me. Most people don’t really want to be a therapist. Similarly, I don’t want to be most people’s “therapist” either. There are a very few people (mostly relatives actually) who I have that kind of intense relationship with, but with most people our discussions are pretty limited to what we have in common (jobs, hobbies, kids), etc.

Is it possible you are expecting more from people than is comfortable for them. Generally, that’s a big turn off in new, less intimate relationships. Keep it light. Keep it positive. Keep it fun. (Particularly when just getting to know people.)

Finally, if you realize someone is not reciprocating contact or interest, it’s because they are not interested. It doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t like you, but it might mean while they think you’re okay, they don’t envision anything beyond very casual acquaintance. Let it go. You don’t have to know why. They honestly don’t have to tell you. It happens. We don’t always hit it off with someone, or we realize over time that we don’t see things as we initially thought we did. That’s not a judgment on your character (or theirs really). That’s just the nature of getting to know a person.