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Originally Posted by divine1966
I have very problematic dad myself. In different ways, my dad is much more passive aggressive and less in your face but it doesn’t make it easier and is a problem nonetheless. “Grey rock” is the only thing that works for me. Arguing never works
I’d not be asking your husband talking to your dad about it. That doesn’t seem like an appropriate tactic to me.
The whole thing explains why you are with your husband, sadly knowing that your dad is abusive explains why you gravitate towards same kind of men.
I’d think therapy would be very helpful. It helped me to break the cycle and not gravitate towards men like my dad. It also taught me to work on my boundaries. Some people manage it themselves but I needed a little push.
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Sorry to hear about your dad. Passive aggressive pare the worst. Therapy is a waste of time & money. Nothing has really helped much in over 20 years.
Most therapists are cold & uncaring. That’s great thar it helped you though.
I think that the only thing that works is ignoring him. Nothing works. It’s not possible to communicate with a narcissist.
They don’t care, literally. I banned him from the house,, refused to see him & my mom this Thanksgiving & Christmas & am now blocking his email & number for 6 months to severely punish him & to teach him that disrespecting me has extremely severe consequences, lol 😆
I made a list of words to never ever mention, fat, diet, weight, diabetes, health. Violation of my boundaries will result in me permanently cutting them out of my life. I didn’t do that yet because my husband forced me to interact with them.
I don’t understand why my husband expects me to just accept my dads abusive behavior.
Btw, most men suck! Most men are bad. They want to control & use women & not care about their feelings.