This was a big way that it was living in the suburbs in USA. The groups of women get togethers didn’t feel like real friendship. It was more supporting each other in their business endeavors, or exchanging prizes. It was nice where they’d serve alcohol and snacks, and we all had social talk, but it never felt like real friendship. And I felt an obligation to go. If I didn’t, I felt they’d think I was a snob and unsupportive. I wasn’t really looking for much deeper friendship to forge in these groups. There would be the friend who invited me, I was like a friend of a friend of the hostess usually. The friendships were just superficial. But this was just the way it was IME.

Plus, with a husband, they wouldn’t want their wife to be too often spending much time with girlfriends during the time the husband wanted to spend with the wife. During the days, everyone was busy with jobs. There were country club type women who played tennis during the days together, but I didn’t do that.

The friends I became truly close with, lived next door and we were in each other’s houses, having our own Happy Hour, really sharing about our lives, really friends. Or I have tried to maintain old friends, keeping in touch, preserving that. But, even most all of those real best friends have moved on and we aren’t in touch anymore. I wish that weren’t the case, but that’s just how that went.

This new friend lives in my building and we have Happy Hour together and are sharing, laughing, enjoying each other. It feels like a real friend. But, we maybe only get together once every other week at this point. She has a bf who visits every weekend and doesn’t see me then.

What are your expectations for a friendship? What have been your good friendship experiences?