WANTS
WISHES
THOUGHTS
NEEDS
FEELINGS

I have a hard time making them match and go together.
how is it possible and why? and how can i solve this conflict?

my main problem is another one, but hoping not to trigger anyone i'll make an example:

i WANT to want to have kids. but i dont want them.
i WISH i had kids. but im glad i dont.
i THINK it would be nice to have kids, but concrete thinking tells me not to have them
as a 40yo woman i feel some need to have kids, but i dont
FEELINGS are the ones telling me its better i dont have kids

my mind, my body, my feelings are all in conflict and i dont know how is that possible, why and what to do about it?

but i know usually FEELINGS win, so im listening to them. but what about the rest?

am i doomed to be unhappy my whole life because these things dont match?

PLEASE, HAS ANYONE AN ANSWER? OR SIMILAR PROBLEMS?