From what you have shared, your wife is an expert in withholding and being entitled All she did was show you she has not changed and will use any way possible to punish you.

It’s a waste of time to tell her you now know about her infidelities. People who cheat already don’t care and are just looking for their own ego fix. Given what you have shared your wife is a controlling person and she doesn’t really care about how her choices affects others. Also, she loathes the fact that you have more power than she thought and that she couldn’t bully you into submission.

Also, given that her children don’t want anything to do with her and chose to distance from her on Mother’s Day she will not be cooperative when it comes to discussing their needs with you.

You just got a fresh dose of how cold she can be and that is a reminder of why it’s best for you to let her go so you can find yourself and eventually someone capable of appreciating you.