((((RD)))))

It can feel like a full grieving process, can't it? Almost like the spouse you loved died, dreams died, etc. And now you're forced to deal with the bulk of the aftermath.

You're being such a great dad. Sometimes the thing kids need most is just knowing someone is there for them. It may be a long process, but you're giving them the foundations that they need, and maybe what's been missed.

I don't expect my DD to leave home at an earlier age. She's had a somewhat chaotic (and often confusing for reasons we didn't understand at the time) childhood. She takes as long as it takes to get where she's going.

You mentioned the executive function issues, which is interesting, because my kid has gone to the other extreme. Hopefully not neurotic though. She is hyper organized and too controlled. That seems to be how she dealt with the rollercoaster. She's an only child, and an introvert, so she's prone to disappearing into her room/own world and just doing her own thing if she doesn't like what's going on. That happens less now as I've gotten better and stopped engaging his disorder so much- the house is much more stabilized, at least for her. But it's sad, because in some ways, teenage DD acts like a 40 year old woman.

Hang in there.