I feel like there's so much confusion for me with this diagnosis. I know it fits and makes sense because of experiences that I've had, but at the same time it feels like everyone that I meet or see with DID knows *so much* about their system and their alters, whereas I know practically nothing.
My therapist has assured me that I know more than I give myself credit for, but it feels like as soon as I start to gain any information about a possible alter, they disappear and it all stops feeling real again. I hear this is a normal experience, but going through it is so confusing and makes the whole thing feel as unreal as everyday life does.
Has anyone else here felt this way about a diagnosis? This has been the most surprising and difficult of my diagnoses to accept, because sometimes it feels real and sometimes it doesn't. Which is normal for dissociation, but confusing to experience.