Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes
When you struggle like this it typically means your relationship revolves around another person who was so insecure that they needed all the control.
It means it’s time for you to learn how to live for yourself and that you probably were raised to think it was your job to make your parent happy. That if you failed to do things their way you were punished. A parent is supposed to help you discover YOU, unfortunately too many parents fail at understanding how to parent.
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Extremely well said.
Please do start a new thread, if you'd like, and let us know a bit more of what you are dealing with, Lost in Wisconsin.
My husband also does not take responsibility for anything. Even when he recognizes that he's done something bad, it's somehow not his fault. It can be mind numbing to watch him twist facts to suit. You are definitely not alone. I've done a lot of codependency work to learn to not be 'other centered.' and it's tough, because the more I take care of myself, the more I'm accused of being selfish. As Open Eyes said, we've been conditioned to do this for them and to ourselves.
