I read a book, “The Happiness Trap” that is based on what Bill is saying. Yes, it is ACT. Reading it may be helpful for you. The concept is recognizing you are having the negative inner voice (the inner critic), and without judgment, recognizing it and releasing yourself from it.

As for developing better social, intimacy, sexual skills… It may come down to it’s more about how you feel about your skills than how they actually are. What is the meter that we use to judge our abilities? I feel it is our perception of the reactions we get from other people. For example: Two people have sex. One person says immediately following, “That was the best sex I ever had.” Now the other person feels confident they are good at sex. We can surmise the one who said it was the best ever, had a physical response that was very gratifying (climax). But aside from the obvious, it is very subjective as to exactly what was done that made it the best sex ever. No two people may have felt the same.

I think the act of over-thinking in social/intimate situations is poisonous to the primal emotions released within when having these interactions. Without much thought, the exchange would have felt more gratifying and positive, imperfect as it was. When giving it too much anxious thought, too much striving for idealistic perfection, that ensures the essential feeling of good, satisfaction, contentment cannot just be, cannot be achieved and will always feel elusive.