I know what you mean about the mental health system dismissing you because you seemed superficially alright. I got similarly responded to. I had a job, supported myself, looked clean, neat and well-nourished . . . had gotten a decent education . . . interacted appropriately with doctors and therapists. They didn't see much of a problem. It seemed to me that they only looked at one's level of functioning. What about one's internal level of distress? It seemed to me they didn't care about that.

Still, I did get attention from mental health professionals . . . because I was willing to pay for it. I purchased their time to the tune of thousands of dollars. I did "therapy" to death. I can't say it ever changed anything for me. I'm not "cured." I still have episodes of painful depression. I told them that I accepted that I was not "curable." My goal became quite modest. I said that I just wanted the episodes to be less frequent and of shorter duration. I was put on drug after drug (anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, anti-convulsants, anxiolytics, hypnotics, dopamine agonists and you name it.) I was told I had treatment resistant depression and offered electro-convulsive therapy - shock treatments. (Those I declined.) I gave up on it mostly, except for one tricyclic anti-depressant that does make some difference.

At one point, I entered into a Partial Hospitalization Program. I went to it 6 hours a day for 4 days a week. The professionals there didn't help me, but the program wasn't a total waste. My peers in the program helped me. My peers started telling me that I had an attitude problem. I tended to argue and debate a lot. We had these classes conducted by the psychiatrist and by the clinical social worker. I tended to disagree with whoever was presenting a class. My peers told me they were sick of listening to me snd my intellectual arguments. It was painful to hear that. But they did show me some warmth. They told me I was my own worst enemy. They told me I needed to shut-up more and just take what I valued out of the program and leave the rest. That feedback from my peers had an impact. For the first time in my life, I saw how my attitude came across to others. It dawned on me that I'ld been making myself obnoxious to those around me.
That's hard to face. I almost left the program out of embarrassment. Instead I stayed. I faced up to the realization that a lot of my chronic loneliness was due to my tendency to alienate others. I'm still not cured. But I keep working on changing my approach to life.

Being chronically depressed means a person has an approach to life that is not working for them.