Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
Sometimes people just distance themselves from other people and there doesn’t even have to be a reason. Although she did give you a reason that she’s busy, but you think she’s lying. I don’t know. I’d say anyone with a job and a husband is reasonably busy. There’s only that much time to see friends
Do you reciprocate taking her and her husband to dinners on their birthdays? If you don’t, perhaps she feels she should stop too.
I have a friend who takes me and i take her to dinner for birthdays and I have a very old friend with whom we exchange gifts but I don’t do anything for my other friends’ birthdays and they don’t do anything for me except saying happy birthday. I’d expect my husband to do something for my birthday but not a friend and her husband.
Honestly it just sounds like acquittance who moved on with her life. She’s not very invested as a previous poster said
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Please see my above reply
to the first poster. I dont want to type everything again. Like I said, she is confusing the hell out of me. She says she cates about me, that I’m a good friend, that I’m fun, a good person, and that there’s nothing wrong with me, she gets me, etc, but then she tries to ignore me most of the time.
I understand that she gets busy, we all do, but this has been an issue for the last few years. I think that people use it as an excuse when they want to avoid someone.
I don’t bother her that often. I only contact her every two or three weeks. We did take her out before for her birthday. I gave her a nice gift that she claimed she liked. She stopped taking me out first. It’s not a big deal, but it signifies a change in our friendship to me.
It’s like I’m not as important as I thought sed to be. It bothers me when people say that they want to do something & then you find put later they didn’t mean amy of it probably.
It was like she didn’t want to day no & disappoint me to my face. Maybe she was hoping I’d forget about things. Idk. What do you think of that? I’m obviously bad at reading people.
I’ve been a good friend to her. I know that she’s meeting other women for friendship. I don’t mind that, but maybe she doesn’t really need me as much anymore.
She should’ve told me that she wanted me to come see her more often if that was an issue. I did offer to see her a few times . We often meet closer to whete I live as there isn’t much to do in her area.
I always offered her gas money when we went out. I was a good friend & my only bad quality was maybe complaining a little to much about some things. She never seemed to mind anything to much though. I’m f she had any issues, then she should’ve said something to me.
She complained about things too. We mostly had fin though & she vented way more than I did usually. I’m so sick of being treated like I don’t matter, ignored, dismissed, and like I’m disposable.
I don’t understand why this keeps happening to me . I dont deserve this. I wouldn’t dump a friend just for having a few issues and they were mostly good to me usually.
If she neefs space, she shpuld tell me. If she’s not interested in doing, something, she should tell me . I told her that in a message today & how I felt like she was doing the slow fade & if I did or said anything to upset her, I’d like to know about it.
She tends to avoid talking about issues sometimes I noticed as she doesn’t like ‘dealing with any drama’.
Is that a part of people pleasing behaviour? I’m very confused as she still sends me hokes & we went to a few concerts together. We’re going to one again in October. We always have fun together. I always pay her back right away.
I don’t understand her ar all. Why is she acting OK sometimes & ignoring me at other times? I’m not sure if she’s lying or not about work, but not introducing me to her sister &.not being serious about the job offer she keeps talking about is weird.
She shouldn’t be talking about things like that when she has no intention of falling through with anything. It makes no sense to me at all.
She’s been doing this for 5 years so far. She seems like a good friend in other regards aside from what I mentioned. Weird!
I’m even more depressed now. I give up on even trying to make friends anymore. I’m obviously not a likeable person & no one likes or cares about me that much.