I think that your wife resented that she was dependent on you. She resented being dependent and accepted the message from her friends to take on resenting men and set on a path of being independent and “using” men. She was unhappy with herself and began to blame you for her feelings of being unfulfilled.

The fact that your wife was already finding ways to extort money from what you were bringing in is in fact a very narcissistic pattern. This is dishonest! Even if you made more money that would not change the resentment she has developed. It’s ALL men for her so she will be the same way no matter what man she has in her orbit.

Narcissistic individuals tend to be jealous and they don’t love, instead they use. This is a part of her character you can’t change. She has already discarded you. In fact, she would take everything from you and not care.

This isn’t a matter of you not being good enough.