Maybe it is a way of coping with the lonliness? If you have memories of him being kind and compassionate and attentive then anyone would find those qualities attractive... But when we don't have much of that in our life, it can become almost a need...

Kind of a way of coping with the lonliness... But a way of feeling it too...

How to deal with transference... Since you aren't working with him anymore (hence can't work through it with him) could you see someone else?

Can take a while... But eventually... The transference feelings should shift to a new therapist (especially if you see a male but probably at any rate) and then you would have the opportunity to work through things with that person. I've tried seeing one therapist to try and process transference for another but that never did seem to work out well... Once I started feeling those feelings for them they were fine about it though. Maybe htey were jealous lol.