It's not worth it. Everything is temporary, things will eventually get better (and then they will get worse, and better, and worse, and better, etc.) and as life goes on you'll learn how to tolerate the bad times better, and you'll see the good times are worth it. I can't tell you what to do, but I really do suggest going to an ER, calling 911 or your country's equivalent, or calling a crisis line.
You're reaching out here. That's a good sign. Keep talking to us