Knowing where my limit is and where to step back is something that took a looooooong time to figure out; I used to be very prone to working myself well past a breaking point. And the downside of that is that you have to pull back so much at that point that you start to feel like you're never going to be able to get anything else done anymore, which is kind of the point I'm at now. Even then, I'll still exhibit the same tendencies. I have what I refer to as "chronic restart syndrome" when it comes to playing games, where the more I learn about them the more I want to start over with the knowledge I've gained so that I can play it more optimally. It's the mentality that nothing is worth doing if it's not done perfectly that's really hard to break out of. I've thus far managed to avoid the urge to restart Zelda and just yesterday finished up the main game. Now I just get to run around Hyrule for all of eternity looking for little bits of golden poop :P

Thankfully, I'm at a point with my projects that I can take a nice long break and be comfortable with what I've produced. Like you said with your writing, the ideas are still there - I think constantly when playing Breath of the Wild about the many ways it could be improved. I'll never be able to turn off that critical part of my brain, but I suppose the real key is not allowing it to prevent me from enjoying what I'm doing, yeah?

I'm quite familiar with the 16 personality types, or at least the one I fit pretty squarely into, which is INTJ. Though this conversation inspired me to go re-take the quiz and I was kind of surprised that it labeled me as ISTJ this time, and the results weren't nearly as stacked this time around. I feel like the only thing that's really changed is that, although I still prefer my solitude in most cases, I've become more comfortable around other people and more empathetic toward their struggles. These two things go hand in hand - what made me more comfortable around others was the confidence in the positive energy I try to spread to other people. My parents both used to compare me to Dr. House (they hate each other and never speak, meaning both reached this conclusion on their own) and I was pretty comfortable with that comparison, but I can also say that I'd be pretty comfortable being compared to Jamie - or honestly even Adam - from Mythbusters.

I've never heard the "extrovert of introverts" label, though... I'm guessing INFP or INFJ?

My meds seem to have me pretty stable at the moment. Anxiety tends to be much more mild and infrequent lately; I've gone from taking hydroxozine at least once a day to taking it at most once every few days. Doing the CBT thing once a day, either via coffee or the tea. Hard to say whether or not that's contributing.


It is interesting that you mention tending only to my own responsibilities, because although my issues with anxiety go all the way back to when I was a child (although I didn't recognize it at the time), they do seem to have gotten much worse since I've been in relationships. Coinciding at least somewhat with me being uncomfortable going out is the fact that I never go out anymore because I want to, it's always because I *have* to. My previous girlfriend was legally blind and therefore could not drive, and my current partner drives what can only loosely be described as a marginally functional vehicle, making me her primary method of transportation in most cases. I could probably tie a lot of my anxieties about going out to the fact that I generally don't WANT to be out if I really thought about it. I'm just not how to resolve the fact that I have reached a point where those same anxieties also crop up when I'm going out because there's something I do want to do.

For now, at least, I'm just focusing on recharging. I'm staying in, playing Zelda more or less non-stop (see obsessive behaviors above), and letting myself feel okay for doing that. More importantly, I need to focus on improving at my own rate and not the rate that my girlfriend would prefer I get better at.

...very curious about that Run to the Hills rendition, by the way. Iron Maiden fans are some of the best people I've ever met. Must be why you're such a kind person :P