My sister tells me too that asking help is not weak I do see my counsellor but she's booked quite frequently. She helps me understand my thoughts and when I talk to her I realise I'm not the only one that has these problems. I also don't feel shame in it anymore I'll be getting more treatment soon. That will be 3 days a week it will be hard with all the studying but I'll get there. What worries me is how I get there but I guess if you want something you have to try your hardest. I don't know how I'll respond to TMS I'm hoping it will work with me. It's a different treatment to cognitive therapy they put electrodes to stimulate parts of my brain. I'll be going to my first appt to get my mapping. Then I'll ask my psychiatrist to give me proof that I have a problem and getting help and hopefully I'll ask centrelink to help me out. It's worth a try I already tried twice to apply for disability.