Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes
At least she is being honest with you. It may be years since you had angry outbursts but that may have already been too late.
Personally, I think some men don’t realize that love can be destroyed if they expect a woman to mother them while they have their tantrums. I personally don’t think it’s fair to think that love was never there. That is expecting someone to give up all self respect while waiting for their partner to grow up.
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I can appreciate your opinion. I may never know the answer to all of these questions, but i have had many questions answered.
The biggest killer of her love for me, according to her, was my obsession with my career as a working musician. I was gone a lot and emotionally unavailable, but that's what paid for the $150,000 backyard and bathroom upgrades, so i think my inability to balance career and a relationship is my biggest failing.
Ironically, i actually quit my job as a performer to spend more time with her, but by then, it was too late.
I will truly miss her, but i do not think we were meant to go any farther than this point.
We have both grown and evolved as individuals, but i had zero emotional tools available when i needed them. By the time i had developed personally, there was no saving it.
I told her this morning that i deeply love her and deeply regret that my behaviors resulted in the end of our relationship, but subsequently i also feel a sense of relief in that i have been set free from an impossible evaluation standard that i would have never been able to attain.
For three years, i lived without any physical intimacy, even kissing, but still needed to cuddle with her each night because that was something that she needed.