I feel the same way even though I haven't had a love in a long time. I find myself realizing that I spend a lot of time alone. I like having alone times but I don't like it being that way all of the time. Years ago I've seen some therapists but they have been no help. They would always tell me to get out there; and I did, but it didn't help me that much. I workout at home and never liked the gyms. I prefer to workout at home and not have stimulation and drama around me. And I listen to the kind of music I like instead of the crappy stuff they play at the gyms.

I feel like it's wrong to be alone a lot but then I don't what to do about it. I don't have motivation to get out there and at times I don't care if being alone becomes a crisis for me. Believe it or not, I don't even go out to eat or get a take-out. I was friendly with a neighbor of mine but I gave up on him because I got to know him better and realized he was a jerk. I bumped into him one time and we just had some small talk. He asked me what do I do with myself during the days. I don't feel comfortable with that question. But I told him what I do. And then he said, "you can't live like a hermit". After he said that I told him that I didn't appreciate his comment. He almost cried after that.

As an older man as myself, I find that making friends with other guys around my age is hard. There are some single guys around my age who live at my place but I find them to be weird. Well maybe I am, too. When I was younger, it seemed like I met real cool guys. But now they seem like zombies. So, I don't know!