@Aviza, perhaps it's just your depression telling you you'll never hear from your daughter. Please let a little time go by, and I bet you'll hear something from her. Not everyone holds permanent grudges for things. I think it takes an extreme amount for a child or parent to make such permanent breaks from each other.

I know when I'm depressed, I have catastrophic thinking. Also often black and white thinking. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can help challenge these thought patterns. A therapist can help with that, or even CBT suggestions online.

I can understand your mom being worried about you. She loves you and wants you safe as much as you love your daughter and want her safe. Please take care of yourself, not just for others, but for you. You've clearly weathered many horrible storms in the past, but you are a survivor.