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nonightowl · Jul 12, 2023 at 01:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Have Hope

snips:

My life needs a complete overhaul. Like seriously. Can anyone relate to feeling this way?

My mother told me this should be an exciting time. Beginning a brand new chapter in my book, & starting a whole new life. But I am just honestly worn out and scared. I'm scared of failure, scared of being abused again, scared of getting hurt and scared of meeting more abusive and toxic types of people. There seems to be no shortage of them, and I feel like I have a magnet on my head attracting them.

I can relate to most of what you said, the whole new life thing. But I wanted to say it's valid to feel scared by it.

The unknown is scary to us; it's wired into our DNA.

I too have not problem attracting toxic types of people.

I don't need them anymore either, nor to be ghosted again and again. It's happened to me on this site, on other sites, in real life. Sigh...

I hate how your mom said "should".

I hate that word anyway, it has such negative connotations, like there's something wrong with you if it isn't "exciting" as it "should" be.

Does she even know or understand what you went through? If anything like mine was, emotionally distant, then she'd have no clue. No awareness at all.

Like you I need a whole new life too. I'd like to get out of my place but don't know where to do. As far as quality people, it's getting harder to find them the older I get. I'm also worn out, emotionally and mentally. It's risky with new people because you don't know what you're getting. And right now I can't take any more shallow people.

Change scares the $hit out of me too.

And with all the chaos and changes in this country/world, one needs stability or routine where one can get it. I guess what I do is start with small steps, one step at a time. But I'm not good at following my own thoughts of that.