I'm sorry you are going through this stressful time. Stress, whatever the source, can be such a heavy burden to bear.

It would be nice if we all had infinite freedom, but sadly our freedom is blocked by forces, sometimes very powerful forces that do not spring from the deepest part of who we are and who we want to be.


It is a little like an underground spring which is trying to emerge from a deep part of the earth but encounters obstacles like rocks and boulders along the way. The little underground stream would like to surface in the shortest possible way, in a straight line but keeps being blocked and diverted in various ways in its attempt to reach the surface.


I think that you are a good person but that your freedom, while not destroyed is constantly being blocked and diverted in various ways. None of us are all-powerful, all-knowing, all-seeing, all-perfect Infinite Beings. We do the best we can given everything influencing us. Those things can be powerful forces blocking the full exercise of our freedom of will. Please remember that your deepest intentions are good and be kind to yourself. We are all out there doing what we can with those little three-pound brains we have.