My Support Forums - View Single Post - How can I stop my husband from blaming me for everything?

eskielover · Jul 14, 2023, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by divine1966

Honestly even if things were your fault, he can’t treat you this way. If he can’t tolerate you, he should get a divorce. If he stays married, he can’t treat you this way. Like if I was careless and broke something, it wouldn’t justify my husband hanging up on me or yelling or refusing to help. Whose fault doesn’t matter here

From personal experience getting to the point of getting a divorce isn't like a light switch that just turns on. It builds up to get to that point but that doesn't mean the lack of tolerance isn't building up & coming out during that period of build up to that point.

I agree that leaving her stranded without the means to get home was a bit radical.....however sometimes when we are fed up feeling the other person is being irresponsible, the gut reaction can be that they will learn a lesson the hard way & next time go prepared. If irresponsible decisions have no consequences, people don't bother to learn any other behavior & in reality they are blaming the other person for not bailing them out for their bad choices as much as the other perdon is blaming them for their bad choices.

My marriage was similar only it was my H who was always messing things up financially & making bad choices. Yes, I left & after I left he totally destroyed himself financially. He never learned & never will because that is who he always was & always will be. But it took awhile to get to the point where I was financially able to leave even though I wanted out long before I could make it happen.