Thanks for the responses. He does believe that living for ones children is not healthy, and that we should put value in our own lives first. I know because of other conversations that we have had where that was said somewhat in passing, not necessarily the main topic.

It was not a case of misremembering the conversation, I'm sure of that. I have a very good memory in general and that was such a striking thing to hear.

While I agree that a healthy person should have their own reasons for life, I was not healthy and very much teetering on the edge at that time and, I just cannot fathom why he would say such a thing. It could simply be a major blind spot, maybe he had reasons like you are suggesting and couldn't see how important that thread to life was for me in the moment.luckily for me he did not sway me, but that might have done someone else in. Someone who take what their T says as authoritative, and it could have been dangerous if i was more like that. I think we both got lucky in that I found my reasons and stayed true to them despite what I see as a major misstep on his part.