I am feeling very much down today. I was in the start of my second week (a repeated second week after I failed the last one). I am so afraid that this week shall fail as well. I know I am cathasthrope thinking, but when one is alone and have nobody to talk to

Well I have decided to go out for tomorrow and dress well. My troath is not the way it shall be yet, but I need to get out. I have tried since right before Christmas to make it. (I did for four weeks before Christmas), but it has been so difficult to follow a path to go on with my life. I have a lot of plans, but I never get there where it is possible to do what is both what I want and what is nessecary for me to feel relief.

Do I believe my own signature? I don't know ...