Quote:
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I said, "I'm keeping my word and I'm training myself to be the perfect husband for a wife someday. I won't have to ask her out, or pursue her. She'll notice me and she'll see my value, whomever and wherever she might be, but it all starts with a better version of me..
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This is where you went wrong and why you got the response you got about your ego.
You did not plant that bush to please your wife. It was more out of spite where “ if you don’t love/want me then I will prove I can do this for someone else.”
I hope the hole you dug is not just a hole in rock. The roots of the bush need room and healthy soil to expand as the bush grows. The roots will need nutrients from the soil for that bush to stay healthy.
Same with relationships. Can’t do out of spite and the heat and the sweat will mean nothing if the task doesn’t leave room for growth and nutrients.