I think... I think that he will be respectful about this. He might try and raise it, but I'm fairly sure that the only response he will get out of me will be that I'll blush and hang my head. I think he will be okay about my not talking about it. Just my telling him... My admitting it to myself and then my telling him really is a big step for me. And I think it will signify a change in our relationship whether it is something that is directly talked about or not.

For a long time... I've felt like parts of me are disconnected from other parts. And there isn't anyone in my life who gets to see something of the different parts. And there is a part of me that deals with online interactions. Email is important to me because I can share something of that other part. I can talk about stuff that I email him about a little... But there are some things that are just too hard. I think this will be one of these. But usually (in person) I think I come across as a little reserved, withdrawn, aloof, etc. Admitting my attachment... Is hard... I think it might help him to know that I do feel that we have a bond, though. I think it will help.