It’s a case of observing behaviours with acquaintances and not committing yourself to friendships until you feel comfortable with them. For example if I observe that someone talks or gossips negatively about others I take this as a warning that I will likely be next to be gossiped about. I had to learn that one the hard way.

You say normal people don’t want to connect or they keep their distance. It’s possible they just aren’t available for friendship, not everyone is open to developing new friendships especially if they have very busy lives, this seems like more of an issue as we age and get more commitments. I can’t say this is the case but it may be a possibility.

I know you dismissed my suggestion to volunteer but it is in my experience a good way to keep social and develop social skills. I’m off this afternoon to help a volunteer acquaintance with a new group, tbh I don’t really want to go, I’m just doing it to help him (there’s a shortage of volunteers everywhere I think!) but it won’t hurt me at worst and at best I might get chatting to some interesting people. Sometimes I need to push myself to do these things but often it does have a social benefit. I know it’s hard when you’re socially anxious but believe me it’s like any muscle, if you keep exercising it then it will gradually get easier.

Lastly I kind of do understand what other posters mean when they say you’re dismissive of suggestions. I’ve given you my best replies and yes sometimes you did thank my posts but you don’t seem like you’re receptive to what I’m saying, likewise other posters.

I have kept replying because you sound like you’re in a stuck place and that’s a horrible situation to be in, I hope that some of what we’ve written will be helpful in some way. You write a lot about fault and I think you were maybe raised in a blaming environment, but reality is that it’s rarely any one person’s total fault but there are things we all say and do which contribute to our situation, as well as others input. It’s figuring out how to unpick and move forward.

Best wishes.