Quote:
Originally Posted by John2023
Sorry to butt in here, but I would like to share my thoughts if I can have a little of your time. Now when someone is struggling and perhaps paranoid their behaviour can become somewhat erratic as they get triggered. Personally (and please bear in mind I'm not a health professional etc), I think stability and security reign more important than the outward displayed behaviours. Understanding and reassurace can be a calming influence, but it's a process that takes time. For example showing kindness to a abused animal takes time before gaining their trust. Criticism etc. might lead to barriers in communication and achieve nothing else besides resentment and rebellion. I wonder if he has any support teams etc. Perhaps these are the people who need approaching for advice, support and help etc. aswell as taking some of the responsibility/burden off your shoulders. I hope this has been of some help.  |
I wish he had someone to confide in honestly and someone other than his mother he would connect with. I am pretty sure he has burnt all of his bridges with all of his friends and family.
I can tell you it won't be me. I married his mother after he was out of the house. Mostly he puts up with me. I am the dude that married his mother, he hast to accept it but that is about it. Earlier I tried to be more friendly and reach out a few times. Anytime I tried to have a constructive conversation with him, his mother would bring it up a day or so later. Not sure why he felt he need to tell his mom everything we discussed, but it was enough of a warning. He didn't want it.
When I come across people that I can't trust, I just go flat, no emotion either way. I really did try to reach out more times than I can tell you. But, now I am the focus of his issues, so I am not anyone he will trust. I am so pissed at him for doing this to me, mostly by his trying to turn his mother against me, but I just bury it.
I understand what you are saying about an abused animal, but how many times do you have to get bit till you back off?