I’ll add an observation. She guilted and shamed you by reminding you how she “raised” you, being your older sister, demanding respect like you’d give a parent. It sounds like you do have a mother. It sounds like her “raising” you really means she bossed you around since you were kids.

I’ve had issues in my family with unchecked narcissism. The person was never held accountable and was allowed free rein. It all blew up in the end anyway.

I agree that your husband is your priority, and you should not let your bully sister come between you.

I’m not implying I think anyone has NPD, but I watched all the youtube videos on dealing with narcissists. Dr. Ramani is an amazing resource in addition to the good advice given by Divine to speak to professionals and clergy.

The best outcome for you would be to maintain peaceful family connections and remove the antagonism from your sister coming between you and your husband.