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Originally Posted by Motts
All good points, Bill.
I hate texting-only “friendships” b/c they aren’t real to me. I’ve been stuck with those types of virtual friendships in the past, where I never saw or heard or hung out with the person, as we only communicated via text message. I’m not a texter. So I can’t handle those types of friendships.
I admit I called her a ‘liar’ because of her text message to me with a ‘heart’ emoji. That made me think she was just blowing me off bc of her pattern of rejecting all of my invites to get together socially over the past 6 months.
I had to draw the line somewhere. I was tired of her not being honest with me. I think at at the end of the day, she just didn’t want a real friendship with me.
While that upsets me because making friends for me is so difficult, I also need to acknowledge that she has a right not to choose to be friends with me. So, I agree with you that calling her a liar was due to my feeling rejected and defensive. While she has no obligation to tell me the truth, that doesn’t mean I can just call her a liar because she hurt my feelings.
That sucks about what your Lyft driver did lying about you to save his rating reputation on the rideshare app. Don’t apologize for being yourself. You are great the way that you are!
I agree that we need to stand up for ourselves. I also agree that it’s a challenge to know when to do that, so that we don’t lose all connections with people because we don’t trust that they have valid reasons for the way the treat us.
I have zero patience for people’s nonsense. I’m 52. I just can’t be bothered anymore with pretending that someone else’s nonsense doesn’t bother me when it bothers me. I stayed silent for 52 years. No more silence. Why should i put my needs second for people who don’t even respect me?
Women will continue to be blamed for setting boundaries. It’s really annoying to constantly have to deal with the glass ceiling created by men to keep women on unstable footing, so to speak.
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Sorry again to hear about what you went through. And sorry to hear about your moms death too. Did that lady make you feel like she might’ve been interested in meeting you eventually in real life?
Some people only want online or text only friendships. People like that will often use every excuse there is to never or rarely meet up in person.
I hate it when people b.s you like that. If that’s all they want, fine, but be honest about things & don’t string people along who are looking to form friendships in real life.
Did you report her to FB? As for that rude receptionist, did you report her to H.R? I can’t believe that she’s a middle aged woman! She’s very immature for her age! She’ll eventually get fired for being rude & unprofessional!
Anyways, I’ll be your friend if you like. I’m almost the same age as you. I’m 51 years old. I live in N. Ca. You? I’m married w/o any kids.
You can private message me. Send me a friend request & I’ll accept it. You sound like a cool lady. I have issues with making friends too. I suffer from anxiety depression, and I have issues with self esteem as well.
I’m also shy and introverted. I have a straightforward personality though, lol 😆
How is your job search going so far? Sorry if I missed anything. The post was long. And yeah, that Lyft driver was definitely trying to cover his butt.
Hopefully his bad karma will catch up with him one day. Hopefully he’ll get caught lying soon & will end up getting fired & sued for making a false assault accusation against other passengers.
Next time you meet someone, it might be a good idea to maybe keep someone in your life if they offer you some kind of benefit. I realize that you’re looking for real friendship, but those are extremely hard to come by these days.
So if someone can offer you some support or if you find someone who is fun to go out with or who happens to like some of the same things that you do, then it’s worth it to keep those kind of people in yoour life to go to a movie, a concert or to dinner with.
If you can go out & just have lighthearted fun with them, then they’re worth keeping around. Not everyone is OK with talking about more serious things.
I think that I lost a few friends by talking about my problems to often. One fun lady I met months ago stopped talking to me as I expected more than she was willing or able to give. I tound her self absorbed behavior to be annoying, but I did enjoy discussing music & art with her.
I blew it by expecting to much & by not bring more tolerant. She was going through a lot & she fid invite me out to go swimming & she wasn’t flaky.
We had similar health issues & problems with our weight & we are both into hair, makeup, fashion & skincare too. I miss her. I’m an idiot, ugh.
So she was self absorbed, but she was fun at least. We went out to clubs & had fun.
So keep that in mind next time. Maybe that kind of friendship isn’t for you though. Idk. For me, I’ll expect less of other people next time.
I won’t tolerate disrespect, I just won’t expect people to
be who I want them to be.