Now that this is in the open, I came here to share personal frustrations I can't otherwise do. I got quite a bit of advice and I did agree it was valid (to a point). Everyone is different and what applies to many may not do so to all. All I ever wanted was to make others understand the reasons I feel as I do on how my looks get in the way of having the things which many probably take for granted. I made such a serious effort to think differently over these past couple of weeks and take the advice I was given, putting it into practice. No sooner was I thinking differently and more positive when I had water splashed in my face by something which happened in my life. I can think all the positive thoughts I want but the sad reminders of what I feared all along will never stop following me.