When you are exposed to people who are respectful and capable of caring you begin to hear much needed positives. This is affirming your worth and is very healing.

When you are exposed to someone who attacks your ego and confuses you it has a very negative affect on your brain and can trigger you to go into survival mode. Being stuck in survival mode gets the amygdala going and it begins to disable the frontal lobe that we need to think and engage in a healthy constructive and productive way.

Your wife attacks things about you that are positive and healthy but in a way that keeps you confused. This destabilizes you in a way where she gains control. She gives out a lot of strange wordsalads that have a strange somewhat religious tone mixed in. She starves you and then throws you a tiny bone of hope. That is known as emotional abuse.

You need to choose people who are positive and healthier. And you need to have this for a while so you get stronger and healthier instead of becoming confused by around someone who pushes you into this confused unhealthy mindset.