Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel
I could never have a blank slate therapist. I do much better when I have facts. Minor details help easy my anxiety (i.e. where are you going on vacation). Things that impact the therapeutic relationship are also important (i.e. L being pregnant). For me, too, it helps to navigate cartain things that might pop up in a non-therapeutic relationship. I do think dosing disclosures and not over disclosing are important, too.
I'm grateful for the amount of details L discloses. It really does help reduce my anxiety, process how the information affected me, and develop a closer bond with her.
P.S. - LT, L and I have a joke about being eaten by bears. Her first vacation she had with me as a client was she went camping. Of course, my mind went straight to fearing a bear would eat her...lol. There's also a saying on a t-shirt I found that says "what doesn't kill you, will make you stronger. Except bears. Bears will kill you".
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I don't think it's just blank slate therapists who do this. Honestly I think it's ones who are trying to straddle some of the learnings/theories of the blank slate model with some more modern versions but are doing a really bad job mixing the two. Like they are more relational and will share 'some' things but are still very firmly standing in the blank slate model which honestly I think is damaging for people with anxious preoccupied attachment styles or who have deep fears of abandonment and difficulty trusting others as do the majority of people who have experienced complex trauma. I really sometimes wish part of a therapists training was to actually read some of these forums. Yes they are our 'version' of what happens in therapy so maybe biased and not always 100% factual who knows but they are our experience..