Thank you for sharing your experiences. I cannot explain nor know why she is behaving in this way. My mother growing up was very emotionally unstable. I grew up in a very unstable, unsafe and abusive life. Home was never a fun or safe place. My mother and father were abusing me and they were very emotionally unavailable. It all did a lot of damage to me. Besides the abuse, I had a lot of challenges and difficulties but I was never supported in them. I was left to fend for myself. I had no idea how to deal with a lot of things. I was only a child. I developed depression at a very young age but no one ever asked any questions. I was left alone in that as well. I'd get home from school, dump my bag in my room and literally go to sleep until dinner. No one ever asked. I was just left there. I never got to really develop in the way I should have. In a nutshell I grew up unloved, abuses and abandoned a lot. I used to make excuses for it all but I no longer do make excuses for any of it. It's not my job to understand why my mother may be behaving in a certain way. That keeps me stuck in the abuse cycle I was in all my life. Also knowing the complexities of it all is not helpful to me because it just reinforces so much of the abuse. It doesn't help me. I'm no professional either but I cannot fix, rescue or save her. It's not my job. I'm trying to understand my feelings and thoughts and my focus isn't on her.