I'm in another depressive episode. Having episodes of depression is part of my life. Always has been. I expect it always will be. In between episodes, I feel quite well and normal. The reason I'm here, starting a thread, is because lately there's been too many episodes too close together.

I tell myself that I'll get over this. I always do. It might just last a few days. But it's getting real demoralizing to keep falling into a trough. I barely get to feeling normal again, when I skid off the road back into a ditch. This heat doesn't help because I'm less active, which is not good.

Any encouragement helps. About 10 days ago I was having an episode. I ended up getting very emotional and having a meltdown in front of someone. That really embarrassed me. So I've been keeping to myself a lot.

Next I'm going to shower and dress. I didn't for the past two days. Then I have a messy kitchen to clean. Yesterday, all I ate was bread and butter. Lack of consistent routine is a big problem for me.

I'm starting to fear that this will never end . . . that I'll just keep getting sucked down.